One of the components of my treatment plan is acupuncture. I normally go to a doctor of Chinese Medicine twice a week for these treatments. After each session, I almost always feel a noticeable boost in energy which usually results in more hand strength for controlling my wheelchair. For the first couple of years my body had difficulty holding on to the energy gains from session to session, making it difficult to sustain any real progress. In consultation with Dr. Xie, I determined that a major deterrent to progress was the levels of toxicity in my body. Over time, as I detoxified, we began to observe very small incremental improvements in energy flow.

This summer, due to some logistical complications I took an extended break from these treatments. During that time, my healer, José, reported that we had made significant progress in cleansing the toxins from my body and are now focusing mostly on building strength. All summer long, José has been lamenting the hiatus from acupuncture, feeling that we were missing an opportunity for accelerated healing. So, when I told him that I was starting up again, José was very excited. At the end of my second treatment this morning, Dr Xie was pleased to inform me that my energy held up over the summer, giving us a solid basis for continued improvement.

While this is all very good news, the changes from José’s and Dr. Xie’s work are so incremental that it is difficult to observe in the short term. It is only when I look back over several years that I can be confident of the positive results achieved from the various treatments I have employed. There have also been many disappointments along the way. So, although I have great confidence in both José and Dr. Xie, I struggle with anticipation of the results to come.

On the one hand, I don’t want to get my hopes up too high and suffer a crushing disappointment. At the same time, I know that the strength of my belief is a powerful factor in my recovery. It is a true rock and the hard place dilemma. I can look back and find encouragement in achieving increases in energy, weight and hand strength. Yet during that same period, a very slow deterioration in my speech clarity reminds me of the traditional medical community’s assertion that recovering from ALS is impossible. My salvation in the midst of this struggle is my favorite affirmation, “I believe in living in the moment, total present time, and loving the challenges”. The moment I start to anticipate what might be, I am cast into turmoil. As long as I stay focused in the present, I can observe what I have, feel grateful for it, and remain positive about the possibilities for improvement.

How have you dealt with the conflict between wanting to avoid disappointment, and wanting to think positively about your chances for success?

During my life before ALS, the thoughts that often filled my mornings had to do with things like how quickly I had to be out the door, which clients I’d be seeing that day, which projects had to be addressed, which planes or trains had to be caught, what office work needed to be done, and when I could fit in a workout. These days, my focus is quite different. As Diane scurries around our bedroom preparing to begin her day, I am slowly stirred to consciousness. The first thing that usually captures my attention is the resistance of my left eye to open. Between the overnight secretions of my eyelids and the minor weakening that ALS has achieved over the muscles that control them, most mornings I awaken to the sensation that someone has mischievously crazy glued my left eye shut. In the struggle to free it, the thought often enters my mind that ALS may be winning the battle of the eyelid. Thus, my first choice of the day presents itself. Do I give in to the panic of projection that one day my eyelids may not part, and succumb to the disappointment, frustration, and fear that accompany that thought? Or, do I choose to remain present to the moment, stay calm, and save my energy for opening the eye? So far the latter choice has consistently served me well.

Having won this battle, and achieved a little more consciousness, I proceed to the recitation of my gratitude list, taking the opportunity to revel in the gift of another day.. Recounting the many blessings and joys in my life focuses my mind for the day on being present to the positives. And so I begin: “I am grateful for the trees, the shrubs, the grass …,my wife…, children…, family, friends, congregation, caregivers, colleagues, my home,….” After the gratitude list comes a series of affirmations, a series of statements designed also to focus my thoughts in a positive direction. A good resource for learning this process, and designing a list of affirmations that will work for you is Louise Hay’s book, You Can Heal Your Life. My list includes statements like: “I am accepting the abundance of healing energy in the universe, and I am grateful to participate. I believe in living in the moment, total present time, going with the flow, and loving the challenges. I am grateful for the gifts in my life constantly. I live in gratitude and abundance always.”

My list has grown to more than 40 affirmative statements that I have now been reciting every morning, without fail, for the past four years. Sometimes, I have completed the list by the time my health aide, Jimmy, enters the room with a cheery “Good morning, Joe. How are you today?”, as he begins to prepare me for the day. When I have not finished by the time Jimmy arrives, I simply continue silently, as he takes me through the morning paces. If he or Diane has a question or comment, I will address it and then calmly return to my affirmations, always remembering that the purpose is to keep my mind operating in a positive energy field.

Inevitably, thoughts will emerge about activities I used to enjoy in which my body will not currently allow me to participate. Thoughts like these have the potential to drag me into a dark place filled with sadness and other negative emotions, which do not promote healing. Each time my thoughts lead me toward that dark path, I use affirmations to shift my attention back to the gifts and sources of joy in my life. Suddenly, I am noticing the antics of the squirrels, birds, and deer outside my bedroom window that quickly bring a smile to my face. Each time my thoughts drift to the darkness, I am challenged to make a choice about where to put my attention. Living with ALS provides a constant stream of opportunities to make such choices. In order to hold open the possibility of recovering from ALS, or other serious illnesses, experience has shown me the importance of keeping the mind positively focused to promote healing throughout the body. Attending to the mind/body connection has contributed to improvements in my sleep pattern, elimination of chronic pain, and improvements in body functions. So, I work very consciously to enjoy the gift of each new day, and to make choices that promote my healing.

What experiences have you had that demonstrate the health connection between mind and body? Let me hear from you.